Tales From The Tuxedo Inn

Life, Art, Auto -Not Tuxedo Rental

Oh James!

Written By: Justine - May• 06•15
Oh Barney!

James Bond is returning in “Spectre”.  The movie posters are out in force.  If  the NR Cinema wants me to pony up ten bucks to watch the next Bond flick, they need to take those posters down.

When I met friends for a Sunday afternoon movie last week the front of the theater was chocked full of  adverts for coming attractions.  But the poster that stopped us dead was Danial Craig duded up for Bond number twenty-four.  The bespoke tuxedo had been replaced by an Archer  style tactile-neck and a pair of black chinos.  The expression on the face  is supposed to be menacing but the square chin, poked out upper lip, and protruding triangular ears made me say, “Barney Rubble”.

“They’ve got Barney Rubble dressed as Archer playing James Bond.  The apocalypse is imminent.”  I sighed and longed for the Pierce Brosnan days.

“I didn’t think they could take a bad picture of Daniel Craig but they sure have.” someone else said.

James Bond movies, for better or worse, have always been favorites of mine.  I watched them with my father when I was as kid.  My mother would have been mortified if she’d know that was the kind of movies he took me to.   Sean Connery was still holding forth then.

Over the years I’ve learned to laugh at, ignore, or see through the sexism.  I’ve also noted the rapidly shrinking women in the opening credits.  The story lines have morphed from dire, to campy, and back to serious.

When the “Casino Royale” reboot came along I loved it. I fell madly in love with the Aston Martin.  (Always a good sign.)

But ‘Spectre’ is looming large and it’s looking like Bond has gone Bedrock and Hipster both.  A fictional fixture is roaring into the future and I’m not sure if I can go with it.  Maybe it will just take a bit of getting used to, this Barney Rubble in a tactile neck.  Or maybe I’ve stopped being able to adapt to new styles and standards of suave sophistication.  But I don’t think so.

Perhaps tt’s just been a rough spring that’s all.  First I’ve lost the James May inhabited “Top Gear”.  Now I’ve watched James Bond go hipster.

Oh James the time’s they are a changing.  I can only hope for the better.

goodbye james

Post “Top Gear” James May

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